You might be thinking, so what? Camille, everybody does stuff by themselves. Well, not me. I used to hate being alone. If an event came up that I really wanted to go to, but I couldn't find someone to go with me, I used to just stay home instead. I would forgo eating meals so that I could eat with a friend or my family when they got off work.
There are plenty of advantages to being alone. For one, you can't be ignored or excluded. I don't know if I'm the only person that this has happened to, but whenever I go out with a big group of people, there is always that moment where everyone kind of forgets about me and I have to push myself back into the conversation. Okay, that sounds really depressing when I put it in writing, but it's true! Secondly, you're on your own schedule. You don't have to wait for your friend to finish eating so you guys can catch the movie you bought tickets for. You can just get up and go whenever your heart desires. Finally, you get to think. Whenever I'm really busy or social for a long period of time, I always recognize that I haven't just sat and thunk for a while. And you can't get anything really productive done without thinking.
"But Camille", you ask, "you wouldn't be alone all the time if you just stayed on campus where all your friends are!"
Every weekend I have to get out of where I always am. I think growing up in Eden Prairie ingrained this urge to go somewhere new, or at least somewhere else, at a minimum of once a week. Spending too much time in the 'burbs can be incredibly suffocating, so it was only natural to want to get out and go somewhere where interesting things actually happen. Morningside isn't too different. Don't get me wrong, it is infinitely more interesting and lovely than Eden Prairie can ever imagine being, but it is pretty far uptown and separated from the rest of Manhattan. I need a dose of the heart racing hustle and bustle that this city is known for. I have a feeling, though, even if I lived in the heart of New York City, I'd still feel this urge to get out and go to a different neighborhood at least once a week. I can't handle things that are too regular, too monotonous.
Take now, for example. I'm sitting in this amazing cafe in Greenwich Village literally inside the NYU campus. Coming here was probably not the smartest decision I've ever made. I had to take the crowded train for 30 minutes and walk another 20 just to get here. But was it worth it? Just walking around the neighborhood from the subway improved my mood a thousand percent. I love seeing people who are different and new and exciting. I love doing things that are different and new and exciting. If I had stayed on campus, I would have seen the same people that I always see and done the same things that I always do.
I think that's a symptom of growing up, being comfortable with being alone. As extroverted as I am, and as much as I require human interaction to function properly, adults are secure enough in themselves to go out and live their lives without a babysitter. And even though I would rather have a friend or companion to accompany me on my adventures, if I can't find that, I'm still going to get out and experience life and try new things.
As always, if you have any comments or concerns, or want to get in a fight with me for whatever reason, all my socials are @theonechameleon. Or if you want to be my friend, those are welcome too.
I hope you enjoyed the second installment of "Camille's-life-updates-in-NYC".
I should come up with a catchier title.
Camille
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